Sometimes you just can't help yourself

I grew up in Illinois with 2 brothers and a loving mom and dad. It was a small town, the kind where your parents know what you did before you make it home. My oldest brother and I “turned” out okay. My parents took us to Church, taught us respect, love and kindness. In high school my older brother started doing drugs. It was just a little marijuana on the weekends at parties. Being the little sister I did not want to “rat” on him. Looking back now I wish I would have. Later when he got into cocaine it was obvious to my parents. They tried to get him help, tried everything they could. There is a saying, “you can’t help someone who doesn’t want to be helped” and this is so true. I can’t go into this story because it would be too long but my brother is now 42 years old and is still “hooked” on cocaine. My father offered to get him help, was even going to pay a lot of money for a treatment center, but he wouldn’t go. He lives on the streets most of the time but comes home every few days and passes out for a few days. I have no idea where he gets his money but he somehow finds a way to buy his drugs. My father passed away 5 years ago and Matt is taking advantage of my mom more and more. The other day my mom and I were at a birthday party. It was only 5 miles from her house and she left her camera at home and I offered to go get it. When I pulled into the driveway I saw a car there that I didn’t recognize. When I went into the house I saw a man and a woman sitting on the couch. They were both strung out on drugs, it was obvious, and one even had a cigarette lit. Something in me snapped and by the time I got done with them they were out the door and into their car. I am a petite woman, 5’1 and 120 pounds, and they were scared of me. I told them if they ever stepped one foot into my mom’s yard I would call the police and I meant it. It’s a shame my brother is like this. My parents always blamed themselves but it isn’t their fault. He grew up in a loving home and there isn’t anything more they could have done to stop this from happening. I just pray one day he will overcome this evil inside of him and I get my brother back again.